In this episode, we discuss things that you could be doing that are stopping you from living your best life, and things to do instead, plus I break down how to live the best life for you and it’s probably not how you think.
Topics covered include:
- Identifying habits that are holding you back
- Perspectives that aren’t allowing you to grow
- Simple habits that will bring more life to your life
There are many people out there living their best lives but I don’t think a lot of people understand what living your best life actually means, what it actually entails doing. That’s because so many people are out there living their so called best lives but really aren’t happy with themselves on the inside or the outside or with their life and they’re still out there on Instagram using the hashtag #livingmybestlife.
Living the best life are not these habits
Let’s first discuss what living your best life is not, because this is what most people think living your best life actually is.
It’s not waiting for things to happen for you
It’s not waiting for your soulmate to walk into your life. It’s not waiting for someone to give you a raise. It’s not waiting for your body to magically be fitter or skinnier because we know that that just doesn’t happen.
Yet somehow people always end up sitting on the couch eating potato chips, thinking that it’s going to happen if they work out maybe two days a week. Or people convince themselves that the right person will walk into their life right when they want them to.
We find ways to convince ourselves that things are just going to start happening for us without actually putting in the work.
There’s so much advertising out there in the world claiming how easy everything is, which is a lie. Everything is simple. It’s very simple to do most things in the world, but easy, no. It’s not always easy and most of the time that’s because it takes a mindset shift. You have to look at things differently, and learning how to make a mindset shift is not something that we’re taught how to do in school.
We’re not taught how to overcome limiting beliefs. We’re not even taught how to do taxes. Nevermind how to do things like understand our subconscious thinking. We’re not taught any of this which I believe the world needs to know. Instead we’re taught to just wait for things and it will come to us if it needs to come to us, if it’s meant to be.
I do believe that some things are meant to be and that things do happen for us for a reason. But you’re also the creator of your life. You have to go out there and actually get things. Your best life is not just waiting for things to happen to you because if you continue waiting your chances of things happening that you want to happen are pretty slim because no one is looking out for you as much as you are.
It’s not just living fabulously
It’s not going out and spending a bunch of money, taking Instagram pictures holding cocktails or frolicking on the beach on an expensive vacation. It’s not just living fabulously and then claiming that that’s your best life.
Those could be some of your best moments, and that could be really exciting for you. I encourage you to share those moments and to love them and to splurge every so often. But your best life is not just spending money.
It’s not just having fun all the time, especially if you ever feel guilty after spending a bunch of money.
It’s not splurging on great lattes or taking absolutely breathtaking vacations so that you can’t live normally for the rest of the year. If you’re in a scarcity mindset for most of the year so that you can have little splurges every day or massive splurges maybe once or twice a year then you’re certainly not living your best life everyday.
If you’re counting dollars all the time and you think that things or people are going to leave you then you’re stuck in a scarcity mindset.
If you’re really living your best life, you’re not worried about things leaving you because you’re so happy with who you are, where you are and who you’re being. Even if your bank account were to dip or if your partner left you, you’d still have faith that you’d be able to attract more money or another person who’s even better into your life.
It’s not what you see on social media
People love to show off on social media and their best lives (yours included) is not what you see posted or what you post.
There’s nothing wrong with wanting to show how great your life is, I do it sometimes too. But if that’s all you’re doing and then putting your phone down and feeling shit about yourself or only feeling a high from posting about your so called best life, then you’re not really living it.
It’s not talking about others
Talking about others and gossiping is very low vibe and it will drag you down. I am not immune to it, it’s a work in progress for me but becoming more aware of your gossiping is the first step.
Unfortunately gossiping is really ingrained in society as being okay when really it’s not. The only time it’s okay to talk about others is when you’re uplifting them or saying something good about another soul.
When you catch yourself gossiping, ask yourself: what was I gaining from this? How was this serving me?
What living your dream life is not
Overall, it’s not looking for outside sources or external validation to tell you that you are living your best life. You are the only person who can say when you’re truly living your best life because you’re the only one who knows the version of you that you want to be. You’re the only one who knows what truly makes you happy.
What living your best life really means
Living your best life is really learning how to step into your own control, your own power and really owning who you’re being. Even if you’re not the ideal person that you want to be yet, knowing that you are on your way and working towards being that best person is how to live your best life.
It’s also important to remember that the best way to live your life is not how others tell you, including me. If living your best life is living fabulously, go and do that. Only you know what living your best life means for you.
It’s building healthy habits that you can do daily
It’s doing the inner work. It’s sitting down and journaling or going online to find the journal prompts to help you journal if you don’t have any idea what to journal about. It’s sitting down in meditation. It’s doing EFT tapping.
It’s whatever it is you need to do to get you to let go of past beliefs that are you’re holding onto that are keeping you in a lower vibration.
It’s investing in yourself
When I first started reading a lot of self help books and listening to personal development podcasts and really starting to begin to engage in this world of personal development and spirituality, everyone was preaching: invest in yourself.
I never understood why so many people said how important it was to spend money to be a better person. But what’s different is that investing in yourself is not just spending money, it’s spending money in things that help you grow.
Over the past year I have invested thousands of dollars into courses, programs and coaches and now I get why people preach that investing in yourself is the best thing that you can do for yourself.
It’s because free information doesn’t get you to put any skin in the game. There is so much free information out there that you could literally learn everything you want to do for free.
I built my entire travel blog and make my full time income off of it because of free information that I learned online. You can do that too.
It will probably take you a lot longer if you’re learning things for free, but when you don’t have an energy exchange, and money is energy, then you’re just going to continue to take in this free information and not take it as seriously because you have no skin in the game.
Having your skin in the game means you have some kind or risk or something to hold you accountable.
You absolutely can find free information and grow but you’re probably not going to take it as seriously as something that you would pay for and you’re probably not going to grow as much or have as many breakthroughs as something that you pay for because you have no accountability to someone or your bank account.
It’s much harder to make a commitment to something that is free because it will always be there and most people will always find an excuse to come back to it later.
I’d say it’s an absolute necessity to invest in yourself. You don’t have to go out and spend thousands of dollars, even small investments, any type of energy exchange, no matter how big or small will still still help benefit you.
It’s finding people who uplift you
Living your best life is finding a core group of people, which can change over time, that uplift you and help you grow. These kinds of people are called expanders.
They’re people who have been through what you’re currently going through and will have some insight to help you.
I once read this quote that went along the lines of: 30% of the people in your life should be people who are expanding you. 30% of the people should be people who are on the same page as you, going through the same thing, so you have someone to discuss things with. 30% of people should be people who you’re also helping to uplift.
I can’t remember what the last 10% is but my point is that you should have expanders, people on your level and also people that you’re helping to expand as well. This will help you not only grow and have connection with people, but also give you a sense of helping others as well. Living your best life is getting help as well as giving help in order to help the world grow and level up as a whole.
It’s learning to set boundaries
Learning how to say no and set boundaries is a developed skill which I go deep into in another post that discusses ways to say no and how you can do just that.
It’s living for you
It’s learning to live your life for yourself. Just you, not for your mom or your dad. It doesn’t matter what your parents, partner or anyone else says, they’re not you. They don’t understand your wants or your needs. They don’t understand what your soul is calling you to do.
They have no say over what living your best life is for you because you’re the only person who can know that.
It’s learning to get honest with yourself
Learning how to get real and being tough on yourself when you need to be is important. But it’s also important to know when you need to be easy on yourself. If you’re tough on yourself and have high expectations for yourself then learning to tell yourself to take a break could be getting honest with yourself.
But if you’re someone who can easily take a day off or can easily take a step back, then maybe learning to be tough on yourself will be the hard part. Either way, getting honest with yourself is living your best life because it will help you get self aware and be able to do things for yourself that need to be done in order to grow.
Most importantly, living your best life is learning that working on yourself from the inside first is the best thing that you can do for yourself and to drop all needs of external sources or validation.
Life is special and all of us are constantly striving for that true state of bliss, true joy and happiness because that’s what we’re put on this planet to experience. We’re not supposed to be here just to be in misery. We’re supposed to experience all emotions and working on getting to those high emotions, vibrations and frequency is literally everyone’s life work.
Simply put, working on yourself from the inside, living for you and experiencing absolute joy and bliss every single day is living your best life. Get out there and start living your best life, you deserve it.